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At Scamadviser.com, we aim at providing fact-based information to our users so they can make well-informed decisions before purchasing online. As Valentine’s Day is approaching, we decided to take a look at a one of the most famous types of scams, romance scams. These schemes which are usually preying on credulous people looking for their next love story, often have the same structure and way of proceeding. We interviewed several victims of romance scams, in order to better understand how they work and to warn our users.
“Scamadviser (S): You were confronted with one or several romance scams, how did the scammer present him/herself?
Mr X (X): I have been confronted with two types of romance scams. The first type of scams I have been targeted by all seems to be part of a big group of people working under the same administration. I say this because they all say the exact same things, at the same time. So it’s like they read from a script. These are easier to spot as scams. The second type was by a single person with no clear reason as to why they were not truthful. Maybe they didn’t plan the “relationship” to carry on as long as it did. But both types present themselves as caring and passionate trying to get you to trust and like them so they can then manipulate you to do what they want
S: Did you believe in the scam, can you detail what happened and how did the scammer do it?
X: With the scam involving the individual, there was no indication of specific intentions by this person in the beginning. But after a while of being in contact with this person, they start to act like they are into your sexual fantasies and ask for money in order to continue to carry on the relationship. They make it sound like I don’t deserve my money but they do and that it’s my purpose to give them my money. If I refused to give them money, they said they would tell everyone I know about my sexual secrets.
S: When/how did you understand that this person was a fraud?
X: Once I realized they were from a different country I knew they could not text message, my friends and family like they said they were going to. I also just told them that I didn’t care if they did, so they should do it anyway. When nobody I knew said anything about it, I knew it was a fraud.
S: What were the consequences (money-wise, but also psychological) of this scam?
X: I lost a lot of money because of this and ended up losing my apartment in the long run. I struggled financially for about a year after and could never get back on my feet. I had to start all over in a new state to finally get over that financial hump. It messed me up in the head because she really made me believe that I did not deserve money and it turned into a sexual fantasy for me. So now the idea of giving a woman my money is something that arouses me sexually. So it’s a fight I fight against daily.”
As we can see it, (romance) scams have both concrete but also psychological consequences on their victims. Not only can they dramatically affect and change their way of life, but they can also affect their ways of being.
If you have a doubt about a website, don’t forget to test it on Scamadviser.com, and to perform a manual check with our checklist available hereby.
